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Step 4. Keep your eyes on the prize


I’ve read this chapter few times since couple of days ago. I understood it, but I didn’t feel, maybe that’s why I didn’t write about it yesterday.

The concentration in the life is very important, we all know that. I know, that I’m calmer when I’m concentrated, when I think rationally, and not give up to emotions. I am doing better when I don’t think about what bad can happen until it hasn’t happened. Actually, the first time I learned it, was when I was working like a waitress in one sea town in Lithuania. There were devil busy days, when I was working 16h/day, no time to wash the face in the morning, no time to eat, just always be nice and serve the clients. During the first days I was losing motivation and the hope to do my job good. Sometimes instead of pint of beer I was bringing soup, sometimes I was convincing my clients that they didn’t order what they thought they did, but they ordered what I brought – even it was not true, of course 🙂 Finally, I saw that this is not working out and I change my way of thinking, I started to think: “they come here to eat, they see that it’s busy time, so they know they’ll have to wait. What I have to do, to serve them drinks, show them my attention and go back to take food order when I have served drinks to ALL my tables.” I made a system of my work, I concentrated and didn’t let anyone to distract me. It was amazing, how great I was doing! There were moments, when I had like 10 tables at the time (there were  maybe 24 in total in our bar), some of them were with 4-8 people, and I never made a mistake! Or even if I made, I made them laugh at me, said sorry, and fixed it. No problems at all.

This system really worked out during my stay in USA, when I was also working like a waitress, but in different country, using foreign language. The job was harder, but the way of doing it helped. Later I adapted that to the journalist job. All deadlines, people not answering phones, talking bullshit, not giving the permission to publish, complaining, not coming to interviews… I’ve had a lot 🙂 But concentration and not thinking about what bad can happen until it hasn’t happened, let me stay calm and do my job good.

So, this is what S.Chandler says: “Rather than focusing on our goals, we are distracted by our worries and fears. But when you focus on what you want, it will come into your life.”

This is what was happening in my life last years – the fear to fail, the fear not to achieve something in my life, while my friends already did it, took away my concentration of what can I do to change it. I fail to distraction of my worries, thinking that it’s the best way to work out with my life. This is what’s happening now when I go to driving classes. I go there accompanied by my fear to do bad, to fail, to argue with my instructor again, and yes, I do so. Last times I was going there calmer and doing better, even though, I had argued with him. But it was not the point of my attitude, it was more of his way of “teaching”. At the end, I’ve changed my instructor and I hope to pass the exam.

Other thing, sometimes it seems, that people focus on their goals – get a job, earn money, etc. What I want to do first, focus on me – on my way of thinking, attitudes and happiness. As I’ve told before, I guess, happiness is not a prize for the “winners”, it’s a thing for others. We don’t even deserve, or not deserve it, we decide to be happy, or not to be happy. And every day this decision can change, depending on our wishes.

So amazing to start this grey, rainy day with these thoughts 🙂

Sobre las hojas caen las hojas. El tiempo fluye.

Leaves fall on the leaves. The time is passing.

Japanese haiku.

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One thought on “Step 4. Keep your eyes on the prize

  1. Pingback: How were these 100 days towards self motivation? | If you want to be happy - be

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