… when people get really bad, they leave their present, sell their houses, take few must-have things to their bags and leave somewhere where they haven’t been, where they don’t know anything and anyone. To put in short words – they leave their comfort zone and go out. Just where the happiness is waiting for them.
Use your comfort zones to rest in, not to live in. S.Chandler
This is the background of motivation, happiness and all other things. When one is comfortable, save, warm, fed up, not hungry nor thirsty, one is living like in a magic world, when no efforts are needed to archieve something. And if we remember the first steps in this self-motivation path, they were about doing, about archieving something – the results we see, make us continue the path. When everything is done, the death is on the corner.
Staying in the “soul cage” protects us from outside dangers, from harming ourselves, from something we don’t know. Also, it protects us from new discoveries, new knowledge, new experience and new points of view.
“And yet, only challenge causes growth. Only challenge will test our
skills and make us better. Only challenge and the self-motivation to
engage the challenge will transform us. Every challenge we face is an
opportunity to create a more skillful self.” – S.Chandler.
Everytime we go out our comfor zone, we face the things about ourselves, we didn’t know we had. Or we create some new ones, if we feel lack of them. And those moments when we see that we did what we didn’t believe we would be capable of, are full of happiness, self-proudness, and joy. It recovers the belief, that even “I” could do that. And then, just the matter of ourselves to adapt the knew knowledge to the old environment, when we are back. It’s not easy, indeed, but not impossible either.
The first time I faced up with being outside the comfort zone, was when I was 18 and I went to work to one sea town. I was alone, far from home, it was my first time to spend 3 months sleeping in other bed, not mine, be there with unknown people. Since that time I “became dependent on” the adrenaline and that feeling when you enter some place where all the doors and windows are closed and you are opening them little by little. Later it was 4 year journalism studies in other city than my home town, first travel by plane to USA and 4 months there, and later – volunteering in Spain. The rest of 3 years were full of living outside of my comfort zone. That was an amazing experience. I just crossed the line and instead of creating a “soul cage” for resting, in one moment I converted it again to a “place to live”. That was my mistake. I know it. Now. 🙂
During these 3 years I’ve lost the concept of “home” in Lithuania. My adolescence flat is not my home, my room is not my room anymore. Now I’m like between the sky and the earth – I don’t have my home in Spain anymore and I haven’t got one in Lithuania yet.
On the other hand, this is well known place, I know all the details, my mother lives here, she takes care of me, so I’m not hungry, thirsty, I’m warm and in some sense save (emotionally no, ’cause my mother is particular case and I don’t have good relationship with her.) But at this moment I need that feeling of comfort, even though, everyday less. Last month I couldn’t even think about living somewhere alone, because if so, I wouldn’t have eaten, doing shopping or cleaning around. Now I’m getting into the human world little by little and I’m starting to do this house stuff again 🙂 So, in this sense, it’s my comfort zone, even though I’m not happy here.
As I’ve started my master, everything is new for me – despite is the same city where I was raised, it’s new way of studying, new people, new experience, I’m new and I don’t know what kind of me people are seeing. I’m facing challenges during the classes, I’m taking driving classes, everything makes me to make my comfort zone bigger, it’s like I’m having challenges. Little, tiny, but still challenges.
I’m good now in my half comfort zone, because now it fullfills it’s function as a place to rest in. When I’m fully recovered, I’m sure, the feeling of leaving it will appear with all this strenght. And now, soon, I’m going to have a new challenge – an anthropological fieldwork in Basque Country in Spain. The country and the languages won’t be new, but everything else -yes. Can’t wait for it!
I think, it was the book “The alchemist”, where it was written, that
the only thing which makes that we don’t fullfill our dreams, is the fear to fail.
Let’s assume the risk and enjoy the victory! One way or another, it will always be the victory!!!