How many times we ask ourselves “who’s the boss? Me or my lack of motivation”?
Last year, when I was getting prepared for 5km solidarity running in Madrid (I’ve never run more than 1,5km, and it was only at school, 10 years ago), I had just 2,5 week to get ready. I started slowly, I thought, that to run 400m without a stop was an achievement. I was proud of me. Later I started with some program and last day before the running I did 4km. I didn’t do more just because I was a bit lazy. That day I was running, listening to Coldplay “Viva la vida” (it is said, that Pep Guardiola was used to motivate “Barcelona” football players with this song), I was tired like hell after 3,5km, but I asked myself:
“Who’s the boss? You or your body?”
And I said: “Me!!!!”
It followed next thought: “So, then behave like a boss!” And I ran. Until the end.
In the day of real running, I was listening to Michael Jackson and I did all 5km. Non-stop.
What I want to say, is that in that situation I found, who was the one who controls it – it was me. My success or my failure depended only on me. I chose to succeed. I could have chosen to fail.
Like this, I should have behaved the rest of last year. Paint my masterpiece everyday. Wake up and think, what could I do to make my day great, not to depend on the circumstances, not to react to some events, but to create them.
“The more conscious we are of our freedom to paint whatever we want
on our canvas, the less we go through life as a victim of circumstances.
Many of us aren’t even aware of our own victim status. We read
whatever’s on the coffee table, listen to whatever’s on the car radio, eat
whatever’s handy, scan whatever’s on the Internet, talk to whomever
calls us on the phone, and watch whatever’s on the television—often
too passive to even click the remote control.
We must be aware that we have it in us to change all that. We can paint
our day our way.“
Everything has an impact on us: sad music, movies, news, people… we have to control it somehow. There shouldn’t be any BUT in our daily life. “I’d like to do that, BUT I can’t, because….” That sucks.
It’s still hard to believe what kind of life I’ve been living the past few years. Damn, I’m not surprised at all, that finally it has come the moment when I lost everything. No one is so saint to stay with the person like me. And now, when there’s is nothing to lose, I can make some changes.
I was not waiting for new years. And I’m not still. In that sence of a huge party, festival, or whatever. I’m waiting to make new promised for me, finally to start to work on me, and start everything with a white canvas. I even have atitle for next year: “Year for me and my life.” Or something like that. I need to recreate myself. Something was not working before.