You have ants in your pants. My aunt was used to say. And my friend. Some of the people I know lately say that they’ve lost me in the map and have no idea where I am. I’m not sure it’s true. I’m always in the map. Somewhere. And I pay a huge price for that. For being that dynamic dot which is always moving.
Some people are afraid to lose me.
Some people don’t want to get used to me, because they think I’m gonna leave soon.
Some people don’t want to give me a job, ’cause they think I’ll leave anytime I decide. They don’t trust me when I say I can be stable. Can I?
I love some people, but I always have to say them bye. And I never know when I’ll see them again. But I see. Some of them. The dearest ones.
I can always go to see my friends and be sure that I’m gonna have a wonderful time.
Lots of thoughts, advantages and disadvantages… doubts. Is it good or bad?
And now… Since I’m finishing my master in couple of months… I’m asking again myself: what’s next?
I’m consciously not taking any jobs, any responsabilities, anything what could keep me in Lithuania, anything what would make my decision to leave harder. It’s like I’m cutting the ties which are left and preparing to go. Getting ready to part. This time with one way ticket to somewhere I don’t know what’s waiting for me.
My body is asking for a new page. For a challenge. For a possibility not to fail, but to fight. To create. Am I able to do this?
I don’t need extreme change once again. But I don’t want comfortable, easiest plan either. Denmark sounds like a plan. I have few friends there, have no idea about the language, love Copenhagen. If somebody was lucky, why shouldn’t I be?
I have no money, no job for the moment, nothing. Just an idea. And since today on I’ll try to work on this and see how my plan called Denmark works. I’ll keep you posted.
Wish me luck, give me advises, share your experience and encourage me. I don’t want this to become only a risky adventure – I want this to be a new start and a moment to grow. I need this. I’m ready for this.
And until then: If you never try, you’ll never know. Coldplay.