The same emotion of moving out of the comfort zone. Bittersweet joy, little worries of how is it going to be this time, open heart for new experience and wish everything to be ok.
In few hours first time on my life I’m going to put my backpack (until now it was an orange bag or luggage) on my back and I’ll go on the road. There I’ll meet my classmate and we’ll stary our journey to Berlin…
Can’t wait to see Berlin. No, can’t wait to start the travel, to be on the road and see what happens. If I open my heart, I suppose, I will meet people with the same opened hearts.
On Sunday I should go to Bremen. I will visit my classmate from school, I haven’t seen him for 8 years… When I was 12, I was inlove with him 🙂 Now he is married. He’s always been on of my best friends in school.
Next day it will be Dusseldorf, but just for a while, once I’m there, I should go to the airport and in early morning of next Tuesday I’m leaving to Santander. And in the afternoon finally I’ll reach my destiny – San Sebastian. 🙂 Again this year. For another two months. Some easy, peaceful feeling in my heart.
And during this time I expect to firewell my past and let it go. When I do it, new winds will come.
This was the name of my travel diary which I had some years ago. I just decided to make my blog a bit more live, so a part that I will be posting my everyday pictures, I will put some of them also here. I’m not a professional photographer, I just like fixing the moments 🙂
So, take a look and enjoy.
Time square. New York, 2008
Alcala de Henares, 2012
El Escorial, 2012
San Sebastian, 2013
Niagara falls, 2008
Staying in one place and have some “must do” list is always fun. So, it doesn’t matter I’m here for one month already, there is some time left and I will try to make some list what I’d like to do.
- Visit San Telmo museum (I was just in one exposition, some more left)
- Order a drink or smth in Basque language
- Take a bath in the sea
- Go hiking
- Dance all night long
- Spend a relax day only for me in the beach or in the harbour
- Go to jazz concert
- Go to the theater for 3 euros
- Go to Getaria
- Watch the sunset in Kontxa beach
- Go to the Maria Cristina park
- Find the best pintxo
- Go to Perla (SPA)
- Run in the beach
- Eat ice-cream in the old part
- Go to Sidrería (indeed, I´m going to do it soon)
- Discover Antiguo (it’s the district I’m living, but I still don’t know it)
- Go to the university library
- Go out with people from my NGO
- Catch the moment of joy and keep it for a while
Well, one more month has passed, and one more evaluation is needed.
January was strange, long, intensive, different month. First of all because I came to San Sebastian, I started my investigation-looking for a master thesis topic months here.
- I would say, that I haven’t done everything perfectly. I’ve lost the control and that concentration which I had during the autumn. This month I was like more enjoying the time here than being focused on what I’m doing. So it’s like I have some double feeling – I have a pressure that I should be working more on observation, on the other hand, this time is very good to not to say anymore that I’m recovering from big changes of my life, but that I’m already living my new life.
- First weeks I was having a bit hard time, feeling strange being back to Spain but in completely different situation, without my boyfriend, etc. But little by little I managed these feelings, and after he came to visit me, now I feel better.
- The other bad thing I did this month, was that I was posting way less. I really feel better with my life now, and all the stuff, but I don’t like the idea, that I can concentrate and focus on the things only when I’m bad. I was writing in one of the steps about not waiting until something bad happens, but being conscious all the time. And it seems, I’m doing it. It shows, that there is still a long way left for me in changing my life – I’m better now, I’m more conscious, I’m not repeating some mistakes, but I still keep some my old habits. On the other hand is good that I’m discovering it now, that I have these situations, because if no,I would believe that I’m already completely new and later I would be very dissatisfied and frustrated. 🙂
- I met one guy which I started to like this month. But the important fact is not that there is a guy or smth, because we are not going to become a couple (we both don’t want it), but important is that I was able to realize and let myself go thinking, that my boyfriend is a past and I have to move, I have to leave everything behind and understand, that if I like someone, I’m not betraying my ex.
- What I have to do next, is to recover my control, focus and go on like I’ve been doing until now. It seems like there is a big light in the end of the tunel.
Ok, as I have mentioned in my previous post, that these two days I’m a bit less motivated, I decided to use a therapy of positive thinking and think about 20 things in my present life which make me happy. Let’s see if I reach this number 🙂
- I have compromised to do this 100 days to the self-motivation route, and I’m still doing it.
- The good results of first semester of the master.
- New people in my life in Lithuania, with whom I feel quite comfortable.
- I see the sea everyday!
- I have an amazing possibility to live in San Sebastian, at least for a while.
- The knowlegde of spanish language.
- New experiences and new people I’m facing being here.
- The honesty and concern of the people whom I don’t know so well.
- I have a possibility to travel a little in Basque Country.
- There is a huge respect between me and my ex boyfriend. There is still hope, that maybe one day we will get back together, if we still have the feelings for each other in that moment.
- The parents of my ex boyfriend still love me and they want to see me when I’m here.
- My friends from Madrid are coming to visit me in February.
- I’ll start to learn basque language.
- I’m running in the beach. I’ve fullfiled one of my little dreams!
- People appreciate my job and they have a faith in me. Sometimes more than I do 🙂
- Grey’s anatomy 🙂
- Awards for my blog. I’ve already got 2 🙂
- The belief that time is passing and everything will be ok sooner or later. I know, that it depends on me.
- The peace I have inside of me.
- The wish to live.
“An active mind cannot exist in an inactive
body” – S.Chandler
That’s one more S.Chandler’s true. Lately I feel like I need psysical activities, as I’m sitting at home all day and working with computer or reading books. I need to take a rest from mental work and move my ass a bit.
“Sometimes, all you need is the air that you breathe to motivate yourself.
Going for a run or a walk or simply deep breathing gives the brain the
fuel it feeds on to be newly refreshed and creative.”
These pysical activities are going to be included into my next year plan. As in 12 days I’m going to be in San Sebastian, I’m planning to go to run every morning, or if not every, then 3-4 times a week. The weather is going to be better there, even it’s raining.
I remembered the joy of running when I was writing my last post about 5km running in Madrid last year. So I will definitely come back to sports not only for me, but also for my brain!
Merry Christmas everyone!